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SIYE Time:12:42 on 11th December 2024
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Before I Go
By XODannyXO

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Category: Post-HBP
Characters:Harry/Ginny
Genres: Angst
Warnings: None
Story is Complete
Rating: G
Reviews: 8
Summary: One shot. Harry and Ginny have a talk the night before Harry leaves to vanquish the Dark Lord
Hitcount: Story Total: 5093







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Before I Go
By xoDannyxo



Disclaimer: the Harry Potter characters do not belong to me, but the plot does. The song at the bottom belongs to Unwritten Law, titled Before I Go.



The night was chilly even though it was the middle of August. I watched as the Boy-who-lived stood on the porch, his hands crammed into his pockets, staring up at the starry sky. I couldn’t help but feel the urge to go and join him, but our break up had been hard enough, even though I knew why he had to go.

It was nearing midnight and most of my family was already tucked away into their beds. I sighed and watched Harry stand for a while longer before I couldn’t take it anymore. I set down the letter I had been writing to my best friend at the kitchen table and walked to the door. I opened it and Harry didn’t even stir, he just continued to look up at the stars.

“Hey Gin.” he said, not turning to look at me.
“Um…hey.” I didn’t know what I was going to say. I didn’t even know why I was standing here next to him.

Silence.

“So, um…you’re leaving tomorrow, then?” I sounded stupid, I know I did. Of course, that’s all anybody mentioned around here for the past month. That’s all my mom cried about for the past week.
Harry nodded and still stared up and the stars. “I’m sorry, Ginny.”

I was taken aback, not knowing what he should be sorry for. “For what?”
“Our break up.” he finally turned to look at me, his emerald eyes finding mine.
“You shouldn’t be sorry-” he cut me off.
“I didn’t want to.” Harry said quietly. “I just had to.”
“I know.” I felt my throat clench up and I forbade myself to start crying. No one would see me cry.

More silence.

Harry’s gaze had fallen back to the stars, and I finally looked up, wanting to see what was so amazing. But I saw nothing but the twinkling brightness. I heard Harry sigh and felt his gaze shift back to me, so I turned to meet it. I found his eyes were filled with the most pain anyone could imagine, and I couldn’t take anymore. I felt a single tear slid down my cheek, unwilling to be held in anymore. I couldn’t wait for this war to be over.

“Don’t cry.” Harry said, a little more forcefully. He moved closer to me and took my hand in his. My stomach still got the same butterflies they did as when I was ten. I couldn’t help it; this man was my hero, my everything, my reason for getting up in the morning.
Harry reached up and wiped the tear from my eye. “I can’t stand seeing you sad.” he whispered.
I nodded, but another tear fell down my cheek. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.”
I felt him pull me into a warm embrace. I wrapped my arms around him securely. I was so happy to finally be back into his arms, that I didn’t want to let go of him when he pulled away.

He turned back to the stars. I watched them sparkle in the reflection of his eyes, but finally turned my gaze to the stars also.
“It’s funny,” Harry said in his quiet manner he had adopted since the end of last year. “The stars just twinkle like nothings’ wrong. When really there is…”

I looked to him and now saw that he was crying, silently. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his coat and took a deep breath. He turned to me again. This time my hand went up to wipe the tears trickling down his cheek. “Oh, Harry.” I felt my own tears fall down my cheek again. “I don’t want you to leave.”
He pulled me into another hug, holding me tightly, as if I might slip away.
“I don’t want to either.” He whispered into my hair. “I wish I could stay here with you.” He kissed my forehead and ran his hand up and down my back softly. I listened to his heart beat in his chest and prayed that I could hear it one more time after the War.

We stayed like that for minutes, I would be content with staying like that forever if it meant he would never have to leave me.

He put his finger under my chin and moved it up to meet his eyes. I stifled a sob and he kissed my forehead tenderly again. I stared into his eyes, etching this moment in my memory. I would never forget his eyes. The most purest shade of green there ever was.

His breath was hot as he moved closer to me. I closed my eyes and felt his lips brush mine. Then he deepened the kiss.

The kisses when we were going out were different than this one. This one had such a unfathomable passion that couldn’t be denied. It was as if he was kissing me for the last time. And I hoped it wouldn’t be the last time. This kiss was one of those that deserved to be in a muggle movie. A kiss that could bring anyone to their knees, and I was glad that Harry was holding my so tightly, or else I would’ve been on my knees.

And all too soon it ended.

***

I awoke the next morning in my own bedroom, the events of last night a blur.
I remembered that today Harry was leaving and shot out of bed, not even bothering to change out of my pajamas. I ran up to the attic and pushed to door open with such force that it hit the wall with a loud bang.
The room was empty. Harry and Ron’s bed was made neatly and there was no clothes or parchment strewn across the floor messily.

This can’t be, he couldn’t have left without saying goodbye.

Then I saw a piece of parchment next to Harry’s bed. I picked it up and sat on his bed. I opened it slowly, so afraid of what it would say. My breath became shorter and shakier with every sentence I read.

Ginny,

I don’t know how to write a letter, let alone a love letter, but bear with me. I’ll try my best. I’m sorry I had to leave you without saying goodbye, but I knew I would take one look into you beautiful hazel eyes and not want to leave, so Ron, Hermione, and I left in the middle of the night.

I can’t tell you how scared I am, Ginny. Even though I have my two best friends with me, I don’t have the love of my life. The one who I someday hope to marry. I don’t have you. And what I’m scared of is that I’ll never be able to see your angelic face ever again.

And now I’m off to try to rid the world of Lord Voldemort. And, as you know, it’s either him or me, and I hope and pray that it’s him.

I’ll never forget you, Ginny Weasley. You are my world. You are my life. I hope that when and if I get back, you will be there waiting for me. And I hope that you will become my wife so we can grow old together and have as many children as you want. I promise I’ll get you that dream house you always talked about, the one with the white-picket fence.

Until the next time I see you, I love you, Ginny Molly Weasley.

Yours, forever and after,

Harry Potter


I reread the letter probably a million more times before I finally set it down. I leaned back against the wall and cried. I couldn’t stop. I hit my head against the wall, clutching his letter in my hands. I’ll never see him again. Never.

Hours later, I finally emerged from Harry’s old room, wiping my eyes. I went into my room immediately, closing the door behind my and flicking my wand so it would lock. I curled up in my bed, bottled-up tears still streaming silently down my face and read the letter again. And again and again and again.

***

Three years later, I sat in my living of my two bedroom apartment in Diagon Alley, flipping through an old photo album. I saw pictures of my family first, when I was still too young to even begin Hogwarts. My family, including Charlie, Bill, and Percy, smiled and waved back at me in front of the Burrow. I was only four in that picture. I was sitting on my dad’s shoulders, holding an ice cream cone.

I turned the page and saw Charlie staring back at me, along with Fred and George. I turned the page again and my mom and dad smiled at me. I recognized this picture as their twentieth anniversary. I turned the page once again and was shot straight to Platform 9 ¾. It was my time to Hogwarts and I smiled as if I were embarrassed, which I was. My mom had been crying a river that whole morning and her loud sobs were causing quite a scene on the platform, even though most of the other mothers were crying also.

That had been so long ago. That was when I didn’t know the evils this world could hold. But know they were gone, for the most part. Harry Potter had defeated the Dark Lord, but in doing so, had also died. They never found his body. Ron and Hermione had made it out alive, although Ron was near death when the aurors found him under a pile of rubble.

I turned the page and found a picture of a black haired boy, striking emerald eyes and a lightning-bolt shaped scar on his forehead. My heart lurched. This was the first picture I had seen of Harry for nearly three years. I forbade myself to look at his picture. I just wanted to get over him, although my heart knew fully well that I never would.

I struggled to turn the page again, but was greeted again by his face, but this time it was accompanied by my face. We were so happy then. It was when we first started going out in my fifth year at Hogwarts. That was the happiest I had been in months. I watched as my picture looked lovingly at him and he returned the same look.

I turned the page again and found the letter he had written me three years ago the night before he left. My eyes welled up with tears as I picked up the letter and read it slowly. All the feelings I thought I had finally forgotten came rushing back like a tidal wave. They knocked me down and soon I was sobbing uncontrollably.
“Why did you have to go?” I asked out loud. “I loved you so much…I still do!“

A soft knock came from my front door, knocking me out of my frenzy. I contemplated not answering it, but took my wand off of the table next to me and waved it, causing my tears to go away and it looked like I hadn’t even been crying in the first place. I hiccupped and walked over to the door as another soft tap came from the other side.

I opened it slowly and peered through the small crack I made. A jet black-haired boy with piercing green eyes looked back at me,
“Hey.” he said softly.

I had to be dreaming, this couldn’t be real. Could it?

“Hey.” he said softly.
I opened the door wider, allowing me to see his full figure. “Harry?”
He nodded and his messy hair fell into his eyes.

I couldn’t help it, but I threw myself on him, hoping against hope that I wasn’t dreaming, because than I would hate myself in the morning. But as I touched him and felt his arms hold me after three long years, I knew this wasn’t a dream.

I cried, with happiness this time, and finally managed to get out “I th-though you w-were d-dead!”
Harry shushed me and pulled me inside with him and shut the door.

He put a finger under my chin and forced me to look up at him. “You helped me survive.”
I hiccupped and he kissed my forehead in the same way he had three years ago.
“And now I can tell you in person what I’ve only been able to write on paper.” he whispered. “I love you, Ginny Molly Weasley.”

I smiled and he smiled also, and it was the most genuine smile I had ever seen from him. And as he pulled me in closer for that much needed kiss, I felt right where I belonged and could never have been happier.



***

Life hurts so bad
Don't want you sad
Just look back to
Good times we had
I'd give my soul for you I know
Want to hold you before I go
Before I go
I need you to know
I'm still alive in you
It's my time to go
Don't stay up late
I'm not afraid
And I don't want your heart to break
I know I've seen what's been unseen
Live fast, die young
It's part of me
(it's my time now)
Before I go
(it's my time now)
My soul is on it's way
(it's my time now)
I need you to know
Before I go
Reviews 8
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