SIYE Time:18:23 on 10th December 2024 SIYE Login: no | | |
|
|
|
Category: Post-OotP
Characters:Harry/Ginny
Genres: Angst, Drama
Warnings: None
Story is Complete
Rating: G
Reviews: 8
Summary: He's staring again. He has that same blank look across his face. All I want to do is make everything better, but I can't. I don't know where to start. He doesn't even care that I exist.
Hitcount: Story Total: 5232
|
|
Chapter | |
|
Intertwined
He’s staring again. He has that same blank look across his face. All I want to do is make everything better, but I can’t. I don’t know where to start. He doesn’t even care that I exist.
I want to be his confidant, his lifeline. Someone who he’ll come to when he needs to vent; to cry. But I’m not and that makes me tear up inside. I’ll never be that person towards him.
His friends worry, everyone knows, but they’ve given up. Nothing they do works. Everyone is at a loss. We’re losing him-and fast.
His eyes don’t hold that same bright sparkle anymore, they are just dull and gray. His smile never reaches his eyes, it’s always forced-he doesn’t have a reason to be happy. He’s slowly deteriorating, growing skinner everyday from lack of food. Food has no taste for him, it’s bland, tasteless. Pointless.
I’ve got to help him. Somehow. There has to be a way.
“Harry?” I hear Hermione call from her chair next to the fireplace, “Where are you going?”
Harry has gotten up from his seat; he’s heading out of the Portrait Hole. He needs to leave, needs to get away, and I know it.
I hear Harry mumble a reply, saying he’s hungry. Hermione doesn’t believe him, Harry’s never hungry. I see him flee from the Common Room; his head cast downwards, eyes starting blankly at the floor. He wants to cry, to let everything out, but he won’t. Not now, not in front of everyone.
I feel myself stand up. This is what I have to do and I know it. I leave the Common Room one thought on my mind. Harry needs to stop this, he’s tearing himself apart.
For some reason, I know where Harry went to. I don’t know how, It’s just an instinct. I find myself at the Room of Requirements sooner than I suspected.
‘Show me, Harry. He needs me. I need him. I know he’s in there. Please, Harry, be in there. I’ll help you.’
After three paces back and forth down the hall, I find myself facing a door. Harry’s in there, I think. I’m ready for this. This is something I have to do.
He’s sitting on a couch. His elbows on his knees, head in his hands. I can tell why Harry likes this place so much. It’s quiet; this place will give him time to think. He can be alone. He doesn’t have to keep up the hero stamina in front of everyone-he can be himself.
I slowly walk over to the couch and sit down, “Hi,” I say quietly. I don’t want to scare him. He needs to stay.
His head darts upwards and looks in my direction. His face is nothing but pure shock. He continues to stare at me, I say nothing. I’m too busy looking at his face. I notice the tears in his eyes that are beginning to build, the ones that he tries so hard to hold back. He doesn’t want to cry, he thinks it’s wrong. But it’s not. Every hero has a right to cry.
He swallows thickly and replies. “What are you doing here?”
I feel my heart constrict. He doesn’t want me here. He doesn’t want my help, my comfort. He doesn’t even know me…
“I-I needed to see if you were okay.” I know the answer was simple, but it was the truth nevertheless.
Harry turns his head towards a fireplace that was placed in the room. “Well, I’m fine.”
I know he’s not. I need to remind myself that Harry’s difficult .He’s never had any kind of affection in his life; he doesn’t know how much his body craves it.
“You don’t look it.”
I see his eyes flash. He’s angry now. I can tell. I have to stick through this. “I never asked you to come.”
I breathe in deeply, knowing that I have to keep my temper in check. “I know you didn’t. But I’m going to stay here until you tell me what’s been bothering you, Harry. You’ve been extremely depressed lately. Harry, please, everyone’s worried.”
I see his hands form fists, his knuckles turning white. He’s angry and I know it. I sit there, quietly; waiting. He eyes continue to blink rapidly, trying to keep those shameful tears in but I see one lone tear fall down his cheek and land on his shirt. I don’t say a word.
He sniffs quietly. Very quietly. He doesn’t want me to know that he’s about to cry. To break down. But this is what he needs…
He hates the fact that I’ve come here, I know it. The fact that I’m seeing him in such a vulnerable state and it’s driving him mad. Harry has rarely shown anyone his emotions. Anger, yes, but tears? No.
After a while I see his head turn towards me a little; he wants to see if I’m still there. I am and he sighs. He’s understanding now, realizing, that I’m not going to leave here with out a fight-without answers.
“Everything is falling apart,” I hear him finally whisper, his head staring at the ground. I admit; I’m a bit confused.
“Well, Harry, that’s what it’s going to be like, this is a war.”
He turns to face me. I see the tears still in his eyes. Why does he have to fight to hold them back? “No, I’m the one making everything fall apart. Don’t you see?”
Yes. I do understand now, what he’s getting at. Those deaths; all those deaths- his Parents, Cedric, Sirius. He blames himself, but he shouldn’t, he should blame Voldemort. Everyone else does.
“Harry those deaths, they aren’t your fault. It’s all Voldemort’s fault. Why beat yourself over it?”
Harry shakes his head back and forth, trying to prove my point wrong. “No, I could have stopped them, done something. But I didn’t.”
“Harry,” I started, “Don’t beat your self up over this. Please, this is what Voldemort wants you to do.” I wanted, more than anything, at that moment, to hold his hand, to let him know that I was there.
Harry’s face turned into a grimace. “I just miss him so much.” I figured as much. Of course, Harry beats himself over all the deaths but what’s really bothering him is the death of his godfather.
“I know, Harry.” I really don’t know what to say. His friends have tried to help him through his grief but nothing seems to work.
He sniffs again. “I shouldn’t have been so stupid,” he wails.
He wasn’t stupid, I think. He was doing what anyone else would have done if they would have been in his position.
“Harry, you weren’t stupid. You were doing what any other person would have done,” I answer.
He shakes his head in denial. “No, no, no, Hermione told me it might not be true. It may have just been another one of Voldemort’s tricks. I just-I didn’t listen. She said that I had a saving people thing. But, I just wanted to make sure Sirius was going to be okay. I ruined it.”
Leave it to Hermione to say something that Harry will hold against himself for the rest of his life. I quietly admit to myself that Harry does, deep down, have a saving people thing. But it’s not a bad thing. Not really.
“You just wanted to help him. You loved him, Harry. It’s understandable.” Really, it is.
I see another tear fall down his cheek, I stay quiet.
“He was the first person who acted like a parent to me. He was mine. I could always count on him being there most of the time. He may not have taken things seriously, but he still was like my father.”
Another tear follows the other one; he can’t see to control them anymore. This is what he needs, and I’ll be there for him.
“I know, Harry. There are many people out there that care about you. What about Remus? I’m sure he would love for you to contact him, to talk.”
Harry nods his head, furiously wiping the tears away. “I know, but Remus is so busy all the time. They don’t want me bothering him unless I have to. I shouldn’t be Owling him because of my stupid problems.”
I get angry again. Harry has to go through so much and they still deny him some of the most important things he needs. He needs someone to be there for him. Remus would love to be there for Harry, I know. The war, it just makes things so difficult. But still, the Order, they could try something, anything, to help Harry.
“Harry, if you ever need to talk to someone, I’m hear. I’ll listen.” I grimace at my own words. He’ll probably just think I’m stupid.
He turns towards me. “Really?” More tears fall.
I’m shocked. Harry actually wants me to be the person he confesses to?
“Yeah,” I smile.
He sniffs again, as more tears fall. He tries to cover his face with his hand, but I stop him. I lace my fingers between his own and place both our hands on my lap. “Shhh, it’s alright, Harry.”
He let’s out a chocked sob. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye, I just miss him so much.”
I nod my head, I use my other hand and pull him into a one arm hug, his head rests on my shoulder, and I let it rest there, as he cries. This is something he needs to do.
I continue to sit there, saying comforting words to him while he continues to sob into my shoulder.
I don’t know how long he cries; but I hear him whisper something into my ear before he falls asleep. “Thank you, Ginny."
I glance down as I feel Harry’s warm, even breath, against my neck. I am surprised to see that our hands are still intertwined. I know now, that everything will be okay. It may take months, years, but no matter what we will always be here for each other.
Fin
I………………………..I
I hope you liked it! Please review!
|
Reviews 8
|
Chapter | |
|
../back
‘! Go To Top ‘!
|