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The Longest Quidditch Match
By Jim McGuffin

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Category: Canon Challenge (2004-4)
Characters:None
Genres: Humor
Warnings: None
Story is Complete
Rating: PG
Reviews: 21
Summary: ** Winner of Best Humor in the Canon Challenge **
Harry and the Gryffindors participate in a rather lengthy game.
Hitcount: Story Total: 9953



Disclaimer: Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions in this story are my own and in no way represent the owners of this site. This story subject to copyright law under transformative use. No compensation is made for this work.





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Harry Potter was in his last year at the Hogwart’s School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. But it had been a tough year for his Gryffindor House Quidditch team, having already lost the first two matches of the year to Slytherin and Hufflepuff. Indeed, Slytherin had just defeated Hufflepuff a few weeks earlier to complete an undefeated season. This seemed to Harry to render his final match against Ravenclaw meaningless.

Certainly Ron Weasley wasn’t responsible for Gryffindor’s troubles. He had fared well as the Keeper, blocking over 90% of all incoming Quaffles. His sister Ginny, a Chaser. was also having an excellent season, averaging over ten goals a game. Her success was due to her receiving a Firebolt broomstick for her birthday. Her mother Molly had sent it to her via Hermes, saying that she deserved it for earning all E’s on her O.W.L.s. And Ginny still remembered how jealous her roommates had been the day the owl delivered the broom to the Great Hall.

No, Harry was to blame for all of the team’s losses. Although he was a talented Seeker, it had been a busy year. He had to study for his N.E.W.T.s in order to be an Auror. Also, being Head Boy also gave him added responsibilities. Even though Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster, usually selected among the prefects to be Head Boy and Girl, no one knew his reasons for choosing Harry and Blaise Zabini for the top positions this year. Also the other teams often practiced during the summer while Harry was stuck at the Dursleys’ for three months. So Malfoy and Sommersby had beaten him to the Snitch.

It was the Saturday after the Easter holidays, the morning of the match, and Harry had naturally overslept. Ron’s bed was empty.

“Where’s Ron?” Harry asked, yawning.

“I reckon he’s already at the Quidditch pitch,” said Neville Longbottom.

“You’d better get on out there before Ron gets upset,” Seamus Finnegan added.

So Ron had skipped breakfast? Unbelievable, Harry thought to himself, for Ron wasn’t one to miss a meal. After all, Ron had devoured four corned beef sandwiches only the previous evening. So Harry got dressed quickly, grabbed his broom, and hurried out to the Quidditch pitch. When he arrived, Ron, the team captain, immediately scolded Harry.

“Harry! What do you think you’re doing showing up late? We’ve got a match to play and the Quidditch Cup to win!”

“What do you mean, win the Quidditch Cup?” asked Harry. “Didn’t Slytherin already clinch the Cup by winning all three of its matches? So there’s no way that Gryffindor can win the Cup this year.”

“Actually, they haven’t,” Ron informed him. “Remember, it’s points that matter, not how many victories. After all, the Cannons --”

“We’ve heard this story hundreds of times,” said Ginny, but that didn’t stop Ron from telling the story of his favorite team’s championship run the previous summer yet again.

“It was incredible. There was only one match left in the season, the Cannons versus the Tutshill Tornados. Tutshill had scored 750 points that season to Chudley’s 230. Then it got really foggy so no one could see the Snitch. Several days passed, and the Cannons had enough time to build up a huge 680-160 lead. Then finally the weather became clear enough for Galvin Gudgeon to catch the Snitch. Those 150 points were enough to give Chudley the British League Cup!”

The Quidditch pitch was packed with spectators when the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw teams left their locker rooms and went to the field, where Madam Hooch stood with the box of balls.

Dean Thomas, who had replaced Lee Jordan as announcer now that the latter had left the school, spoke into the microphone. "It's time for Quidditch!"

Cheers came throughout the stands, while team captains prepared to shake hands.

"Today's match is between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw! Let's meet our players! For Gryffindor: Keeper, Ron Weasley! Beaters, Andrew Kirke and Jack Sloper! Chasers, Gabrielle Delacour, Natalie McDonald, and Ginny Weasley! And Seeker, Harry Potter!"

Ron and Cho Chang shook hands and then mounted their brooms.

"For Ravenclaw," Dean continued, "Keeper, Terry Boot! Beaters, Sarah Fawcett and Su Li! Chasers, Benjamin Bradley, Kimberly Brittain and Robert Davies! And finally the Seeker, Cho Chang!"

Madam Hooch released the Bludgers, Snitch and Quaffle. Ginny reached for the quaffle and raced to the three goal hoops guarded by Terry Boot.

"Gryffindor in possession!" shouted Dean happily.

Harry knew that he had to wait for Gryffindor to score many goals before he could even think about catching the Snitch. He knew that Ravenclaw, which had also lost its other two matches, was forced to use a similar strategy. Since there wouldn’t be anything for the Seeker to do for a while, he put his mind on other things.

He glanced at the stands. Hermione Granger wasn’t at the match, because she had so many classes. But he did see Luna Lovegood, who was wearing her usual lion hat.

Ginny zipped across the pitch, keeping an eye out for Bludgers. She threw the Quaffle towards the left hoop. It was caught by Terry Boot.

Terry threw the quaffle to Ben, who caught it and sped across the pitch. Ben was about to pass to Robert Davies, the younger brother of Roger. Then a Bludger streaked by his head. Andrew Kirke grinned at him, but while Ben was looking at Andy, Jack Sloper hit the Bludger back at Ben, forcing him to drop the Quaffle.

“What a great Porskoff Ploy pulled by Kirke and Sloper,” Dean announced.

Seeing her opportunity, Gabrielle dived for the ball grabbing it before one of the Ravenclaw chasers could grasp it. She darted off toward the opposite end. Terry was in the center of the three hoops. She made as if she were going to throw to left hoop. But just as he went to move towards it, she released the ball to the center hoop.

"Score! Gabrielle Delacour takes the first points of the game. Gryffindor leads 10-nil."

Ginny raced after the other chasers, intent on getting the ball. Robert passed the ball to Kimberly who shot at the hoops. Ron was right there and caught the ball, then passed it to Natalie McDonald. All of them then raced back towards the other side of the pitch.

"It's McDonald in possession," Dean shouted, following the path of the Quaffle. "She passes to my lovely ex," he said sarcastically, referring to the fact that he and Ginny had broken up the previous year.

“Keep your love life out of the commentary, Thomas!” said Professor McGonagall with much contempt.

Ginny tried to pass the Quaffle to Natalie. But Kim swooped in and intercepted it.

“Virginia!” the Gryffindor Captain scolded his sister. “Try to be a little more careful next time, will you?” She stuck out her tongue at him.

Meanwhile, a bludger came at Kim and so she jerked her broom suddenly towards the ground to avoid collision with it. Instead, she collided hard into Natalie McDonald.

“Red card!” yelled Dean. “Red card, red card!”

“This is Quidditch, not some Muggle game,” McGonagall reprimanded him again.

After the two third-years crashed, Madam Hooch blew on her whistle and called foul, and Kim was forced to give up the Quaffle for the penalty shot. The Gryffindor Chaser maneuvered herself in front of Terry but "Boot blocks the shot! No Goal! The score remains, Gryffindor 10-nil," Dean announced.

Harry saw the Snitch right in front of his nose, easy to catch since Cho was nowhere in sight of him. But he had to restrain himself, since the score was not nearly high enough to overcome Slytherin in the point-based standings.

And so the score remained low, as both Ron and Terry were nearly perfect at blocking all of the shots. The hours grew into days and nights, but by Monday the score was only 110 to 100 in favor of Gryffindor and either team needed well over a thousand points in order to beat Slytherin for the Cup.

“And as of this moment,” said Dean, “this match has surpassed the 1855 match between Gryffindor and Slytherin for the longest match ever in school history.”

But neither team was tired, for both teams were eager to win the Cup, no matter how long it would take. All of the students were still in the stands. No one bothered to attend classes except for Hermione. After the classes ended that day, she returned to the stands to talk to Harry, who was just hovering near the stands aimlessly while waiting for the Chasers to build up the score.

“Harry,” said Hermione, “just catch the Snitch and end the match now. You and Ron need to finish that Defense essay on the Bat-Bogey Hex for Professor Lupin and Ginny has that essay on the Polyjuice Potion for Professor Snape that she should have started ages ago.” For Remus Lupin had been reinstated as the teacher for Defense Against the Dark Arts when Arthur Weasley, the new Minister of Magic, rescinded the ban on the employment of werewolves.

“As your Captain,” Ron intervened, “I order you to keep on playing, Harry.”

“Well as Head Boy, Harry,” Hermione retorted, “tell Ron to shut up!”

“Then as Captain,” said Ron, “I order you to tell Hermione to shut up!”

“Your classes and N.E.W.T.s are more important than some match,” said Hermione.

“If Oliver Wood were here, he’d say that nothing’s more important than Quidditch!”

“So if Oliver Wood told you to jump off a bridge I bet you would, right?”

“Hey, I think I see the Snitch up there!” Harry lied as he flew up as Ron and Hermione would start yet another row. He wondered how Ron and Hermione ever became boyfriend and girlfriend in the first place.

The argument between Ron and Hermione continued until Robert saw what was going on, and scored two uncontested goals to give Ravenclaw the lead while Ron was up by the stands with Hermione. Embarrassed, he returned to guarding the hoops.

The days grew into weeks. Over the course of the match Draco Malfoy called out from the stands to both Seekers, offering them a thousand-Galleon bribe to catch the Snitch early so that Slytherin would win the Cup.

“No,” said Harry, “not for a thousand Galleons!”

“That would be the Slytherin thing to do,” Ron added.

Soon a Hogsmeade weekend arrived. On the way from the castle to the village, Hermione passed by the Quidditch pitch and decided to stop to speak to Harry.

“Hey, Harry,” she called out. “It’s a shame that you, Ron, and Ginny are stuck here in some match while I’m having fun in Hogsmeade!”

Hermione continued on to the village, where she met Professor Lupin. She had turned 17 in September, and so Lupin had offered to give her Apparition lessons during the school breaks and holidays so she could take the exam the following summer. She had spent the fortnight of spring holidays at Lupin Lodge. Students rarely left the school during the spring holidays but Dumbledore had allowed it this time because she was one of the top students in the school. But the lessons were suspended when Lupin had undergone another lycanthropic transformation, and besides, it was the end of the holidays and school would resume that day. So Hermione and Lupin resumed their Apparition lessons in Hogsmeade.

But afterward, Hermione tried to stop for a drink at the Three Broomsticks. But she found that every single shop was closed, because the shop keepers and every resident of the village was fascinated by the lengthy match and decided to watch it.

“Fred and George are here somewhere, I’m sure of it,” said Ginny.

And she was right. Even the twins decided to close down Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes. They decided to start taking bets, not for who would win, but how long it would be before it ended.

“One Galleon on next week,” said Madam Puddifoot.

“Five Galleons on sometime in June,” Luna followed.

“Twenty Galleons on just before Christmas,” Dumbledore added.

“Madam Hooch,” McGonagall called out, “the students need to be studying. Why don’t you just order the match over now.”

“I can’t,” she replied. “The only thing that can end it is for the Snitch to be caught.”

“Wow!” Fred called out to Ron. “Wish we had thought to have a very long match back when we were in school!”

“We could have gotten all classes cancelled,” George added, “and even the exams!”

Indeed, after a few more weeks, it was now approaching June and the N.E.W.T.s. As the examiners arrived at the school, Hermione warned Harry and Ron that they would fail their exams if they didn’t end the Quidditch match soon.

But now the score was 1630-1570 Ravenclaw. Surely by now, Harry realized, the scores were high enough to pass Slytherin in the standings. Now the Cup would belong to whichever team caught the Snitch first.

But neither Seeker knew where the Snitch was. Indeed, neither team had seen the Snitch in the past few days. It was almost as if the Snitch had become tired of flying around the pitch over the past month or so and just flew away from the pitch.

By now wizards from all over England were at the historical match. This included players from the professional Quidditch teams. They had stopped playing their own games so that they could see how the longest match in the history of the sport would turn out.

“Hang in there, Gryffindor,” called out Oliver Wood of the Puddlemere United.

“Ve vill vatch until somevun vins,” Viktor Krum added. He was a member of the Bulgarian National Team but had signed a contract with the Holyhead Harpies.

The Daily Prophet was there for round-the-clock coverage. Even Death Eaters had stopped their terrorism in order to watch the match. In fact, the Death Eaters Malfoy, Nott, Crabbe, and Bellatrix had all participated in the twins’ gambling pool.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” asked Voldemort who just appeared with a pop. “You’re supposed to be out killing Mudbloods.”

“Trying to win a bet,” said Lucius, who of course had escaped Azkaban. “I have just bet the entire Malfoy fortune that the match will end in July.”

“Well then,” said Voldemort, “I will bet one Knut that the match will end today.”

“Chicken!” called out George.

“What’s wrong?” asked Fred. “The most evil wizard ever is afraid to make a real bet?”

“Okay then,” said the Dark Lord. “I bet everything I own that the match will end today, and that Potter will not catch the snitch.”

“Just sign the form and you’ll be all set,” said George.

But as soon as that was done, Voldemort pointed his wand at Harry. “Crucio!” He was hoping that Harry would fall from his broom and lose so that he could win his bet.

But the Dark Lord had miscalculated. Harry fell from his broom all right, but he was only a short distance from the ground. As he landed his hand fell upon the Snitch.

“Gryffindor wins the Cup!” Dean tried to call out, but after commentating for a month he had a bad case of laryngitis.

“You lose your bet, Tommy Boy!” Fred cried out to the Dark Lord. “You lose it all!”

And so Voldemort did lose everything he owned. He had signed a magically binding contract, which the twins used to protect themselves after Ludo Bagman had cheated them three years earlier. Soon everything, including his wand, magically landed in the hands of Fred and George.

“Give me back my wand!” the Dark Lord ordered. George obliged.

Voldemort pointed the wand at Harry, who recovered from the Cruciatus Curse. Harry drew his wand and pointed it at Voldemort. They simultaneously called out the infamous Killing Curse, “Avada Kedavra!”

But as it turned out, George had given the Dark Lord one of his fake wands from Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes. So rather than a Priori Incantatem effect, the Killing Curse slew Voldemort. At the sight of their fallen leader, the remaining Death Eaters fled. And so Harry had not only won the Cup for Gryffindor, but also the war for the entire Wizarding World. And so all the celebrations began.

After the defeat, Harry was interrogated by two witches.

“Hello, Harry,” said Rita Skeeter. “You’ve just won the longest Quidditch match and defeated the evilest wizard. What are you going to do now?”

“I’m going to Disneyland!” Harry answered triumphantly, referring to the Muggle amusement park located in both the States and in France.

The other was the Chaser Ginny, who said, “There’s another bet I made with the twins. If You-Know-Who is defeated then I get to kiss Harry Potter.”

“Was it a magically binding contract?” asked Harry.

“Just kiss me, you fool.” Harry obliged.



A/N I bet you can't catch all the errors!
Reviews 21
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