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Letter to Ginny | ||||||
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Category: Alternate Universe, Post-HBP, Post-Hogwarts Characters:Harry/Ginny, Harry/Ginny, Hermione Granger, Hermione Granger, Other, Ron Weasley, Ron Weasley Genres: Drama, Romance Warnings: Sexual Situations Story is Complete Rating: R Reviews: 34 Summary: A seventeen-year-old Harry writes a poignant letter to Ginny after sharing a tenderly passionate night with her, declaring his love and intention to return upon vanquishing Voldemort. And he DOES return...it just takes him ten years to do so. Hitcount: Story Total: 31448; Chapter Total: 7479 Author's Notes: It is now June 2007. Ginny is now 26 years old, the mother of a 9-year-old daughter (Harry's) and the wife of the Head Auror at the Ministry of Magic, a man very much like Harry...or at least, Harry as she remembers him. But on this particular day she is in for a surprise--and it remains to be seen whether or not she will consider it a good one. |
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Chapter 2 - TEN YEARS LATER “Mummy, guess what!” Lily Ginevra Thomasson, age nine, came running into the house, her long black hair flying behind her. Ginevra Weasley-Thomasson, age 26 and wife to one Theodorus Thomasson for the past nine years, having married him shortly after Lily had been born, turned around and greeted her young daughter as she ran into the kitchen, cooking up some more Contraceptive Potion on the stove along with the night’s supper. “Keep your voice down, darling,” she admonished quietly but sternly. “Daddy’s trying to sleep.” Theodorus Thomasson worked the night shift at the Ministry of Magic as Head Auror, and had just recently arrived home from work. “Sorry, Mummy. I was just so excited that I had to tell you. I just got an owl from Grandma Molly! She says I can spend the summer with her!” “Aren’t you also supposed to spend part of the summer with Daddy’s mother, your Grandma Rose? Remember, she loves you just as much as Grandma Molly, and hasn’t seen you since you were six years old. Don’t you think she deserves first consideration?” “I was thinking I could go see her the second part of the summer. That would still be a month and a half. That way, I could see Grandma Molly for the first part of the summer.” “I think it should be the other way around, dearest. After all, Grandma Rose is quite a bit older than Grandma Molly. If you wait too long to see her again, she could die. I don’t think you want her to die without seeing you again.” The young girl looked somewhat crestfallen, but had to admit that her mother was right. “All right, I’ll do it that way. Just let me owl Grandma Molly back and see what she says to that, okay?” “Go ahead, love … but come back here as soon as you’re done. Supper’s almost ready!” “Yes, Mummy.” After giving her mother a quick hug, small Lily rushed out again and Ginny turned back to the stove to check on the progress of the Contraceptive Potion upon checking the progress of the supper. Theodorus didn’t know she was taking it and that’s the way she wanted to keep it. She couldn’t blame him for wanting a child of his own, but she wasn’t keen on having another baby–especially one that wasn’t Harry’s. Of course, only she and Theodorus knew that the child she bore nine years ago had not been his, and that she had gone into the marriage not loving him. However, the years had fostered a great fondness between the erstwhile spouses and Ginny found that she was content with her marriage, her child and her life. For the most part, anyway. She had been pleased to read in the Daily Prophet that Harry, Ron and Hermione had successfully destroyed all the Horcruxes and engaged Voldemort, finding it far easier to destroy him than anticipated since all the Horcruxes had been destroyed except for the piece left inside the Dark Lord himself by the time he and his minions caught up with them. There had been a fierce battle and many of the Dark forces had been killed; unfortunately, there had also been casualties on the Good side too, most notably the Patil twins, Angelina Johnson and Neville Longbottom. That was especially sad, since she had heard his wife Luna Lovegood had only recently given birth to their third child. She and Luna had become good friends over the last few years and their children played together often, both in school and at one another’s homes. She had also been quite distressed that Ron had been badly hurt by a Locomotor Mortis curse that had permanently paralysed his left leg. According to her mother, he would have a lifelong limp and have to use a cane, even though he was still only in his twenties. Hermione had also not come out of the battle unscathed, having been on the receiving end of a particularly nasty Sectumsempra curse, bleeding profusely from her chest and abdomen before she had been able to receive treatment. It had even been said that she had been pregnant at the time, and just barely managed to escape losing the baby … a son, as it turned out, who was a carbon copy of his father. As for Harry, it had been said that he had received another disfiguring scar, this one a diagonal one across his abdominal area, as the result of a curse similar to the one that had hit Hermione. No vital organs had been seriously damaged, thankfully, but he would carry the scar as long as he lived, just as he carried the one on his forehead. However, the three friends had gone their separate ways upon vanquishing the Dark Lord, Harry going to the United States for a lengthy assignment tracking down American Dark wizards and witches, whereas Ron and Hermione got married and moved to a home of their own not far from The Burrow so as to be able to avail themselves of both Molly’s child-rearing knowledge and her cooking. A year later, another child, this time a daughter who was the image of her mother except for her blue eyes, which came from her father, was born. These children had also managed to become friends with Ginny’s daughter. Ron and Hermione had never questioned her as to the girl’s parentage, but there was an unspoken knowledge and acceptance between them that it belonged to Harry. However, Ginny had never mentioned that to her daughter, allowing her to believe that her husband was her father. In every way but biologically, Theodorus was … and that’s what mattered. It may have been unkind to think this, but Harry had basically been little more than a sperm donor. A true father spent time with their children, helped them with schoolwork, dried their tears if they felt sad, rejoiced with them when happy, cared for them when they were sick. Harry had been far too busy with his own importance these last ten years. Not that he could be totally blamed for that, since he had had no idea she had become pregnant as a result of their final night together before his departure, but the rest of it was true enough. So much for his promise to return to her once the Dark Lord had been vanquished. Like most promises made in the heat of passion, it was a promise easily made and just as easily broken. Merlin knew what kinds of things he had learned in America, if even half what she had heard about the wizarding ways there was true. It frankly wouldn’t surprise her if he was all but unrecognisable now – at least in every way that counted. There had been pictures of Ron and Hermione in the papers after the vanquishing of Voldemort, but try though she might, she had found none of Harry, and couldn’t help wondering why. He had never been one to seek publicity, but it was ridiculous to avoid it now, of all times ... just when he had managed to vanquish the most evil wizard who ever lived. The last she had heard, he had returned to Britain after a five-year absence just a year ago, but that was the most recent news she had of him. Not even Molly had heard anything, and she had always been like a second mother to him. If he could cut himself off from her, he could cut himself off from everyone. Not even Ron or Hermione had heard from him in that five-year absence. What had happened to Harry to change him so drastically? If he could keep himself away from all close ties for this long a time, it was unlikely she would ever know. It had taken her six months to meet Theodorus after her pregnancy began, and three months after Lily’s birth to marry him. He had been a good, faithful husband and loved her dearly, as he did Lily. He was frankly very much like Harry had once been – or at least as she remembered him being. Merlin knew what he was like now. Her marriage would have been perfect except for the fact that she could not muster up anything more than fondness for her husband. The last passion she could remember feeling had occurred during the last night with Harry ten years ago – the night which had engendered her cherished daughter – and try as she might, Ginny was unable to do any more than submit to her husband and calculate the right amount of response sufficient to please him. Certainly Theodorus deserved better. With a part of her, Ginny felt badly that he was only getting leavings … but he seemed content with that and she had to be as well, because it was a cinch Harry wasn’t going to come back, sweep her off her feet and take her away from all this. If he hadn’t done it in nine years, it was unlikely he would ever do so. If she could only have known what the next three months would bring … * * * * * Ginny had just sent her daughter off to spend the first part of the summer with her Grandma Rose, Theodorus’s mother, and returned to her work on the Muggle computer she had obtained from her father Arthur (to this day even he assumed that her daughter belonged to Theodorus; Molly had kept her word and had neither told him nor her brothers the girl’s true parentage). Not even Ron knew for sure, although Ginny was sure that both he and Hermione suspected, given the girl’s black hair and green eyes–Harry’s black hair and green eyes. Fortunately the hair was not nearly as unruly as his; instead, it had taken after hers and been thick and wavy. She had taught Lily to comb it every day and wash it several times a week. She was doing accounting and database work for her brothers Fred and George, whose business had expanded to several branches scattered over wizarding Britain, and similar work for the Order, finding it challenging and fulfilling. It gave her enough to have her own bank account, although Theodorus’s pay was what kept a roof over their heads, clothes on their backs and food in their stomachs. It was on a particularly warm and beautiful June day that she had gone to answer her door, having no idea who it could possibly be since she certainly wasn’t expecting anyone. She was stunned to find a handsome stranger standing there, long black hair pulled back in a ponytail, a perpetual five o’clock shadow and thick bangs falling across his forehead. His clothing was virtually all made of black dragon-hide, including his knee-high boots, and clung to his slender, well-built but not overly muscular body like a second skin. The only thing familiar about him was his voice; she’d never have recognised him otherwise. “Ginny?” “Harry?” She could scarcely believe her ears. “Harry, is that you?” “Guilty as charged.” He smiled. “Oh, Merlin, I hardly recognised you! You’ve changed a lot!” “So have you …” His voice trailed off. And for the better! he finished in his mind. “But ten years has a way of changing people.” “Ten years? Has it really been that long?” “ ’Fraid so,” he confirmed. “I can tell you all about it if you’ll invite me in.” “Oh, yes, of course. Sorry. Do come in.” It hardly seemed possible that Harry was actually back, actually in the same room with her again. He had not mentioned it to her, but the moment he had seen Ginny again, Harry knew the magic had started all over again. It had never really stopped … and if he was feeling like this after just meeting her again, how must Ginny be feeling? In spite of himself, Harry felt his heart pounding double-time at her nearness – her eyes, her lips, her perfume. Her body had even become more full, more voluptuous; maybe it was motherhood that did it. Whatever the case, it made her all the more desirable to him … and never mind that she was married. After seating him on her sofa, she offered him some refreshment. “Firewhiskey, if you have it,” he requested politely. It seemed like a strange request, since she had never known him to drink anything alcoholic before … but as he said, ten years could change people. It had obviously changed him in more than a physical way, just as it had her. “We have some, but not a lot. Theodorus doesn’t like to have the temptation around,” she remarked. Harry’s eyes widened at the reference and he looked intently at her. “Who’s Theodorus?” he demanded. “My husband. I’ve been married for nine years. We have a daughter.” “What does he do for a living?” “He’s Head Auror at the Ministry of Magic.” “So that’s where I heard that name,” Harry replied. “I thought it sounded familiar, but couldn’t place it. He’s a tall, slender chap with dark hair and eyes, right? And if I remember correctly, he wears glasses. Seems nice enough, even though as far as I can tell, he’s a real git, doesn’t seem to know his arse from his elbow about anything other than Aurors’ work. Why did you ever marry him?” Before Ginny could answer, she was surprised to hear Harry give a bitter, derisive laugh. “Hey, guess what my new nickname is now? ‘Don Juan of the Wizarding World.’ Witches, both young and not-so-young, from all over the world, are literally lining up to sleep with me.” Despite Ginny’s own bitterness and pain, she could scarcely believe this was truly Harry speaking. If she hadn’t known better, she would have sworn that this Harry was not flesh and blood at all but instead, a lifelike robot made to look, walk and talk like him. “Why should you be so surprised at that, Ginny? The innocent, idealistic boy you once knew has become a jaded, cynical man.” “What happened to you, Harry? That doesn’t sound like you at all.” “What happened? Ten years happened. Time can change anybody … even me. It certainly has changed you.” “At least it hasn’t made me jaded and cynical,” she pointed out. “In fact, I still remember how you mentioned the three’s a crowd bit in your letter to me … and am constrained to point out that it could have been four if you had deemed me good enough to accompany you and fight by your side. Never mind what I did for you in the Department of Mysteries, never mind what I did for you the night Dumbledore died —- to name just two incidents.” “That was never the issue, Ginny. I was trying to keep you safe, for Merlin’s sake! It was bad enough having Ron and Hermione’s lives at risk without including yours in the bargain. I couldn’t have lived with myself if something had happened to you. Just the same, there were so many times I wanted you so bad I could taste it …” “But not enough to call me to accompany you. You seem to forget that one is just as likely to be attacked in one’s home as out in the field, but no, you know all the answers and to blazes with what anyone else thinks.” “Bloody hell, Ginny, what do you want from me? I risk my neck, and all you can do is complain.” “That was your choice, not mine.” “And one I had to make. Voldemort had to be destroyed, and I was the only one who could do it.” “Oh yes, the ‘Chosen One’ of the prophecy! I’m so bloody sick of that effing prophecy that I swear if I hear it even one more time, I’ll upchuck! Don’t you get it, Harry? After you left, then never contacted me even once, not in ten years, I felt used … as if I were just a toy, a momentary distraction from what was truly important to you – chasing after Voldemort. As far as I can tell, it’s always been more important to you than being with me.” “That’s not true,” Harry insisted. “You were important enough that I didn’t want to see you controlled like a puppet, tortured or killed simply because of your connection to me. Believe me, I would far rather have had my heart torn out of me than to have walked away from you ... but I had to, Ginny, I had to! I thought if anyone could understand my reasons, you would, but you don’t. You didn’t even try. For Merlin’s sake, I was trying to protect you the only way I knew how! If there’s something wrong with that, then I admit it. I’m guilty as all hell – and proud of it!” “Listen, Mister Big Shot! For your information, I didn’t ask to fall in love with the ‘Chosen One’! It just happened to turn out that way … and let me assure you, it wouldn’t have if I’d had any choice in the matter!” “Ginny …” Harry’s voice was hard and cold. “Is it my fault that your stupid nobility, your totally mental obsession with anything having to do with Voldemort means more to you than I do?” “Ginny, that’s not fair. You have no idea how hard it was for me to do what I did!” “Uh-huh,” Ginny almost sneered. “Is that supposed to make me feel better, or is it simply something you tell yourself in order to attempt to justify breaking up with me? Did you ever consider that I might not want to be protected, but instead stand beside you and fight on equal terms? You seem to have a positive talent for arbitrarily deciding what’s best for people without consulting them.” She took a breath, then continued. “Consider this, Harry. How would you have felt if our roles had been reversed and I broke up with you ostensibly to protect you and never asked you how you felt about what I was doing, simply expected you to automatically understand why I was doing it and not object or feel hurt at being left behind?” He was unable to answer that, so Ginny made herself leave the room to get him the requested drink, barely able to keep her pounding heart under control. Harry had been handsome before, but he was truly gorgeous – even devastating – now. Ten years had done nothing to change the attraction she felt for him. Damn it, why were his eyes still such a sparkling green, his lips still so temptingly kissable? Damn him, why couldn’t she hate him? “Where is your … daughter now?” he asked as she came back into the room and handed him the glass of firewhiskey. “Visiting her paternal grandmother for the summer,” Ginny supplied. “Then she’ll be going from there to stay with Mum. Which reminds me … am I the first – old friend you’ve looked up?” “No, I finally managed to see Molly again. She updated me on everyone; that’s how I knew where to find you. Sounds like you’ve done quite well for yourself.” “Yes; well, after what happened ten years ago, I had to learn,” Ginny returned enigmatically. Harry frowned at her in the midst of taking a swallow of firewhiskey. “What is that supposed to mean?” “My pregnancy decided my fate. I needed to take steps to ensure that I would have a husband and that my daughter would have a father, especially since you never bothered to get in touch with me in the last ten years. I could only assume that you had decided that chasing Dark wizards and witches was more fun than coming back to me and settling down. How easily you forgot your promises, Harry … and you never used to.” “Are you telling me that your daughter is my child?” he demanded, taking another swallow of firewhiskey and fighting not to choke at the knowledge. Her silence told him more than any words. “You never told me.” “How could I? I had no idea where you were … and as I said, you never bothered to get in touch with anyone, never made it possible for anyone to contact you.” “Does your husband know that your daughter is not his?” Harry seemed to ignore her last statement. “Yes, he knows – but he loves her like his own … and I am content with him.” “Content? Not – happy?” “When one cannot have love, they learn to be … content.” “Then you’re simply – content with your husband, as you put it? And does he know that you went into your marriage not loving him?” “Yes, he does … but he loves me. He loves my daughter. He takes care of us. That’s enough for me.” “You need more than that to make a good marriage, Ginny.” Ginny laughed bitterly. “And what would you know about marriage, Mister ‘Don-Juan-of-the-Wizarding-World’?” she shot back. “I believe I know my husband better than you do – and whatever his other faults, Theodorus would never leave me alone and pregnant as you did to go off and play Sir Galahad.” “It’s kind of hard to be a father when one doesn’t know that one is,” Harry retorted. “And whose fault was that?” Ginny countered. “What if I wanted a relationship with my daughter?” “That would be up to her. We would have to arrange a meeting and see how she relates to you. I will not force her. Don’t you dare be so arrogantly presumptuous as to assume that a simple matter of biology gives you the right to come in here and make demands, particularly after ten years of silence!” “What the bloody hell am I, then? Chopped liver?” Harry shot back. “You were, pure and simple, a sperm donor. A true father lives with his children until they are of age; he does not pick up and leave on a whim and stay away for weeks, months and even years, then expect them to welcome him back as if no time has passed. He helps them with their schoolwork, dries their tears and comforts them if they are injured or sick; he feeds, clothes and shelters them, gives advice if they ask for it … Theodorus has done all this. He has been a father.” In spite of herself, Ginny found herself traveling back in time to when she and Harry had first known each other, first fallen in love. That Harry had loved, agonised, cried, sacrificed. This one would literally stop at nothing to achieve his goals … just as she was now certain that he was capable of nothing more than physical lust for a woman, taking any who happened to appeal to him at the moment. She wasn’t even sure if he knew the meaning of the word “love” any more, not seeming to care who he used to accomplish his goals. In that sense, he was almost as bad as Tom Riddle/Voldemort. Harry seemed to guess what she was thinking and said, “I wouldn’t go that far, Ginny. I only kill when I absolutely have to. If possible, I prefer to let others do that, then go from there. I also advise you to be careful what you think. I’m an accomplished Legilimens now. Part of my job.” “What about Occlumency? I hear that’s supposed to be part of an Auror’s job, too.” “Yes, it is,” he confirmed. “But you always had problems with it,” she recalled. “I had a poor teacher. That was the main reason. Fortunately, while I was in America, I managed to find a good one. She was a top Occlumens, and she knew how to do it right. She strengthened me instead of weakening me as Snape did. As a result, I found Occlumency coming as easily to me as Legilimency did. Of course, my … instructor didn’t just teach me that.” He gave her a sly wink and no trace of a blush as he once would have done. “Then I may assume that that means you … slept with her, too.” Harry’s face hardened. “ ‘Sleep with’? I don’t generally stay with anyone long enough for that any more. Haven’t for years. Just long enough to complete the act, usually.” “Then I hope you at least have the common decency to use a Contraceptive Charm, that there aren’t dozens of look-alike kids out there with unruly black hair and green eyes scattered all over the globe.” “Oh, don’t worry about that. I found a long-term spell for that about five years ago.” Another thing Ginny had noticed, but which had not registered with her until now, was the fact that Harry no longer wore his glasses. It was very strange to see him without them. Again, he seemed to read her face, if not her thoughts, as if they were a book. “A bloke who wears glasses generally isn’t considered very ‘macho,’ to use an American term. I got contact lenses about six years back, although I keep my glasses around for emergencies. As for love, don’t be ridiculous. My relationships over the years, if you can call them that, were purely physical. I have not ‘loved’ anyone for years, and I doubt I ever will again. Too much has happened between then and now for me to be anywhere near what I used to be.” “But we loved, Harry. You can’t deny that. We loved! Deeply. Tenderly. Beautifully.” “That was then. This is now.” His voice was hard and cold, but at the same time, as beautiful as ever. “And it was an innocent, childish, chaste type of love. Never did we ever go beyond kisses, a few tentative caresses … and even then, nothing below the waist.” Not that I didn’t want to. Oh Merlin, how I wanted to, even then! he couldn’t help thinking, even though he knew it was wrong to do so, especially considering the fact that she was married now and supposedly off-limits. At least not until our last night together, just before you left, she couldn’t help thinking. “I suppose you don’t even kiss a woman any more.” “Right,” was all he said. “You’re the only one I’ve ever kissed … more than once, anyway.” The only one I’ve ever cared enough for to want to kiss, he finished in his mind. Of course, while he was thinking these things, she was thinking that he had definitely filled out over the years. Still slender, but now very well-built in all the right places. Height-wise, he crowded six feet … not overly muscular, but enough – and his shoulders were to die for! Not quite as tall as Ron, of course, but still a respectable height. Harry had even looked like he’d actually had three square meals a day for a change, instead of looking like a refugee from a concentration camp. Not totally his fault, she knew … those horrid Dursleys! Ginny hoped she never ran into them, for she would surely hex them into the middle of next week for what they’d done to Harry. Thank Merlin he was away from them forever! “I also can’t help noting that you don’t call me ‘Gin’ any more,” she observed. “ ‘Gin’ is an alcoholic drink. Do you really want to be compared to one?” If it means I can intoxicate you, she thought daringly. And she did. As the grown-up Harry gazed at the grown-up Ginny, his heart pounded in a manner which it had not done since he was sixteen and had first fallen in love with her. It was as if the past ten years since their parting had never been and he had become a lovesick, idealistic boy again. Bloody hell, why had he ever come to see her when he knew how she’d always affected him? Especially since he knew that she was married, but had still allowed himself to feel for her again? How could he possibly have been such a damn bloody fool? Just the same, he knew when he had first loved her, he had loved as a boy. Now he loved as a man, with tenderness but at the same time, with fire and passion. His blood positively boiled just gazing at Ginny – her lovely red-gold hair and soft brown eyes, her full bosom and slender waist, her deliciously kissable lips. How very much he wished he could kiss them now … again and again … and never stop! “Look, Ginny, even as much as I’d like to be able to, I can’t simply go back to what I used to be. Too much has happened. I’ve lost my idealism. I’ve seen too much harsh reality, gone through too much hardship, seen too much death. I’m not the idealistic boy you originally fell in love with. If we’re going to even consider starting again, we’ve got to take into account all the changes that have happened to us in the last ten years. In fact, we’re diametric opposites to what we were then.” “Except for one thing,” she remarked. “Except for one thing,” he echoed. “I know it’s wrong, that you’re married, but I … still love you, Ginny. I never stopped. Not in ten years. Others may have had my body, but none ever had my heart. That has always belonged to you – and you alone.” “I never stopped loving you, either,” Ginny assured him. “I never will.” It was mere moments later that the distance between them had been crossed and the one-time (and soon-to-be current) lovers moved into each other’s arms and their lips and hands eagerly, even hungrily, sought the other, and their clothes almost literally seemed to dissolve, they disappeared so quickly. It was also fortunate that Ginny’s husband was not due home for hours and their daughter gone for the summer at her grandmother’s, for nothing save death itself could have stopped the pair from renewing both their romantic (and physical) relationship. What’s more, it seemed as though they had both literally been starved for love; they just couldn’t seem to get enough of each other. Truly, Heaven had come to earth for these star-crossed lovers, and now that they had been reunited, nothing would ever separate them again. |
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