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SIYE Time:21:34 on 28th March 2024
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If You Can Help Her
By witowsmp

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Category: Alternate Universe
Characters:Harry/Ginny, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley
Genres: Action/Adventure, Comedy, Drama, Fluff, Humor
Warnings: None
Story is Complete
Rating: R
Reviews: 570
Summary: This story starts with an alternative ending to Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets where Harry helps Ginny recover from her experience, unknowingly initiating a bond that affects the rest of their lives. Rating is for violence in the later chapters. **A French translation called "Si tu peux l'aider" is being written by the author Sined. It's posted on Fanfiction.Net.
Hitcount: Story Total: 295817; Chapter Total: 8880







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Harry Potter and all characters, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling, not me.

If You Can Help Her — Chapter 17 — Prank Wars

Starts in …
…The Goblet of Fire — Chapter 10 — Mayhem at the Ministry

After breakfast, Harry and Ginny went for a walk outside. “Harry,” said the redhead. “We’re going to have to be careful around the twins.”

He nodded, smiling. “I know. They’ll definitely try to get revenge on us. They’ll turn this into a war.”

“A prank war?” she chuckled. “Sounds like fun! We should probably start planning our next prank now so that we’ll have time for revenge when they manage to get us.”

-

In the meantime, Fred and George had finally gotten out of their beds. “This means war!” said Fred jovially.

“What should we so to them that they’ll even notice?” asked George. “They’re so busy snogging all the time.”

“Snogging,” said Fred triumphantly.

-

That afternoon, Harry and Ginny were sitting in her bedroom talking. Hermione was outside reading some new book.

“Ginny,” said Harry, as he set down his glass of pumpkin juice.

“Yes.”

“I’ve been thinking about my dad and Sirius. They became animagi without the help of any teacher, and without letting even the ministry know. I think I’d like to do that.”

“That sounds exciting,” said the redhead, smiling, putting down her glass. “Do you think you’d be a stag like your father? It would match your patronus.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. It would be cool. Either way, if I can become an animal, it’ll be something else I’d have in common with my father.”

“If you don’t mind, Harry, I’d like to do it too,” she said, nervously. “I’d like to share the experience with you.”

Harry smiled at his girlfriend. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He then leaned forward and kissed her passionately.

They snogged for a few minutes, thoroughly enjoying themselves. It wasn’t until they were trying to separate that they encountered the problem. Their lips were locked together. They couldn’t come apart. It was like they were glued together at the mouth. Their formerly closed eyes went wide open at the same moment as a fear took them over. They immediately started panicking, trying to push each other away. They were unable to speak to each other, only grunt. The only way they could breath was through their noses. They tried getting up off her bed, which took about two minutes of concentrated effort. They couldn’t look directly where they were going, and soon tripped on a box and fell together, their lips pulling painfully at each other, yet still locked. When they finally landed with Harry on top of Ginny, the door burst open, revealing a smiling pair of twins.

“Don’t you two ever stop kissing?” laughed Fred.

“It’s like your lips are glued together!” gloated George.

At that moment, both Harry and Ginny lost their tempers and tried to get up. Unfortunately, they were trying to go opposite directions and ended up falling down before they’d gotten up. They both grunted loudly at this, causing Fred and George to burst out laughing.

“Don’t worry sis,” said Fred.

“The potion we mixed into the pumpkin juice,” said George.

“Will only last three hours,” said Fred.

“You should be able to separate,” said George.

“About ten minutes after dinner starts,” said Fred.

“I can’t wait to see mum’s face,” said George.

“When she finds out you’re late for dinner,” said Fred.

“Because you’re too busy snogging,” said George.

Harry and Ginny had both gotten pinker with every word Gred and Forge said, and by now both their faces were redder than Ginny’s hair. They both glared at the twins with the eye that could see them, and gave the twins the same rude hand gesture at the same moment, causing the twins to burst out laughing yet again.

“Watch your language, little sister,” said Fred.

“What would mum say?” said George. With that, they left and closed the door behind them.

Moving their heads to communicate to each other, they managed to get themselves back into Ginny’s bed without falling again. They mutually realized that there was nothing they could do until it wore off. At this point, they didn’t even want to snog. After about a half hour of sitting up staring at each other’s eyes, they were interrupted by Ron opening the door. “He took one disgusted look at them, shook his head, and said, “Don’t you guys ever stop?” and slammed the door, leaving them alone again.

An agonizing hour later, they heard a light knock on the door. About thirty seconds later, an embarrassed-looking Hermione opened the door, walked in, and closed it. When she saw them both looking at her with one eye, she nervously began speaking. “Er, guys. I know how you feel about each other, but er, aren’t you, er, afraid you’re getting too, er, passionate? I mean, Ron told me that you were snogging in here an hour ago, and you’re still at it. I mean, you won’t even separate to speak to me, which by the way is very rude.” They grunted. “I’m, er, afraid that if you keep this up, you might forget yourselves and do something you’re, well, not ready or old enough for, yet.”

They both grunted loudly at this, and started waving their hands at Hermione.

“What’s wrong? Why won’t you even separate to speak to me?” said a confused-looking Hermione. Ginny then moved her hands to imitate writing. “You, you want me to get you a quill and parchment?” Ginny nodded, bumping her head into Harry’s.

After Hermione had gotten an ink bottle, quill, and parchment, Ginny managed to write in barely legible handwriting, “Can’t separate lips. Fred + George.”

Hermione paled. “You can’t separate you lips? Fred and George did this to you? How long have you been stuck together?”

Harry showed her two fingers.

“Two, two hours?” They both nodded into each other. Hermione was horrified.

“Did they tell you how much longer you’ll be stuck like this?” Harry put up one finger, then another. “One, two. Do you mean one or two hours more?” Harry nodded and Ginny moved with him to avoid being bumped again. “Don’t those idiots know that your lips will be so chapped you’ll want to peel them off!? You’ll probably never want to kiss again after this!” She sighed. “Do you want me to stay here with you, or leave you alone. One finger is for me to stay, two fingers is for me to leave.” Both victims put up two fingers, so she left, closing the door behind her.

After what seemed like an eternity, Harry and Ginny heard Molly Weasley’s voice shouting, “Harry, Ginny, come on down here! It’s time for dinner!”

Then they heard Hermione’s voice saying, “Why don’t I go find them?” They then heard footsteps coming up the stairs. The door swung open, revealing their brunette friend. “Hi, you two. I spoke to Fred and George. After I got them to admit what they’d done, they told me that you should be released in…” She looked at her watch. “…two minutes. I have some magical chapsticks that should help you to heal, but I doubt you’ll be able to deny that you’ve been kissing a lot.” She sat on the bed with them, handing the one to each of them. After a minute of silence, their lips separated, accompanied by the sound of a suction cup being pulled off. They both took deep breaths through their mouths and immediately put their hands on their lips as they winced from the pain of air touching such dry lips. They then applied the chapstick very liberally.

When they were done with that, they both said together, “I’m gonna kill Fred and George!”

Dinner was an unpleasant affair as Mrs. Weasley noticed Harry flinch as a piece of bread touched his lips. She said, “Hey Harry, what’s wrong with your lips?” Harry, Ginny, and Hermione all glared at Fred and George while Mrs. Weasley examined his lips, and then instinctively turned to examine Ginny’s lips. What followed was a fifteen minute lecture on self restraint, wherein Mrs. Weasley said she was giving them too much latitude while the twins kept straight faces. Things didn’t improve after dinner as Mr. Weasley took Harry to his workshop and gave him ‘the talk’ stressing that they need to restrain themselves before they end up in trouble. When he got back, he found out that Mrs. Weasley had done the same thing to Ginny.

That night Fred and George put an impenetrable charm around their room (illegal since they were underage, but the ministry can’t detect who did what anyway) so that Harry and Ginny couldn’t prank them. This didn’t surprise them at all. When Fred and George cautiously opened their door and slowly crept out, Harry, Ginny, and Hermione (who thought the twins had gone too far this time) were watching them from under the invisibility cloak. As soon as the twins were out of site, Hermione came out from under the cloak and performed a spell on the twins’ door, which opened immediately. They all went into the twins room to implement phase two of the plan, knowing that phase one would be complete in exactly eight minutes.

Seven minutes later, Harry, Ginny, and Hermione came down to the breakfast table, where the rest of the Weasleys were already seated. Mrs. Weasley put a stack of pancakes, pan of scrambled eggs, a plate of sausage, and a stack of toast in the center of the table, followed by a pitcher of pumpkin juice. Harry, Ginny, and Hermione were the first to start piling food on their plates. They even beat Ron. When Fred went to get some, he dropped his fork on the floor. When he went to pick it up, he banged his head on the table.

George stuck a fork through six pancakes, but four of them fell to the floor before he got them onto his plate. Harry, Ginny, and Hermione’s looking down and covering their mouths did not go unnoticed by the twins. Fred then tried again, this time managing to stick his elbow into the butter dish, causing Ginny to laugh out loud. With concentrated effort, Fred managed to get some eggs onto his plate. When he tried to jab his new fork into the eggs, the plate emptied onto his lap. George, in the meantime, was trying to get some butter from the dish when the knife he was using hit the side of it, causing the dish to fall over, and catapulting the butter into George’s face.

“Fred, George,” shouted Mrs. Weasley. “I don’t know what kind of joke you’re trying to pull with this behavior, but I taught you better table manners than that! I didn’t raise you to be animals! Now go to your room and clean up! You can come down when you’re ready to behave like civilized human beings!” Fred and George gave a significant glance at the perpetrators both fell out of their chairs. When they got up, they stormed off into their room, tripping on the stairs as they went. Ginny, Harry, and Hermione finished as fast as they could and went straight upstairs and got under Harry’s cloak again so they could watch the results of phase two.

-

“When could they have done it?” shouted Fred. He and George were in his room changing clothes out. They were afraid to try using magic to clean themselves up with because of how clumsy they’d been, although the clumsiness had seemed to wear out as soon as they got back in their room.

“We’d have felt it if a spell this strong was put on us, but the only magic we’ve been around today was when we released the shield around the door,” said George.

“You don’t suppose they could have put another spell on our shield so that we’d get clumsy as soon as we deactivated it?” said Fred.

“Granger could have!” shouted George. “Too bad she took their side instead of ours!”

“You know what that means, Gred,”

“Of course, Forge. She’s now one of our targets!”

By that time, they were fully dressed, and walked confidently out of their room and headed toward the dining room. The didn’t notice the transfiguration that took place as they walked through the doorway, nor the muffled laughter from down the hall.

As they approached the table, they were stopped by a furious-looking Molly Weasley. “WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU THINK YOU TWO ARE DOING?! Where’d you get those from? Did you steal them from Ginny’s room? You go back upstairs and don’t come down until you’re ready to act your age! And Ronald, that is not funny!”

They were confused until they noticed Ron, still at the table, laughing and pointing at their pants. Both twins looked down, and to their utter horror, they found they were both wearing pink mini-skirts over their pants. They turned around and went back upstairs to find the three pranksters standing in the hallway laughing.

“Fred, George,” snickered Harry, winking, “I never realized how beautiful you both are.”

“Those skirts really match your red faces,” said Hermione.

“Not to mention your Weasley hair,” added Ginny. All three burst out laughing. After a few minutes, the twins joined in.

“We’ve got to admit it,” said Fred.

“This is pretty funny,” said George.

“But it’s not over yet,” said Fred.

“We’ll see who has the last laugh,” said George.

“Yes we will,” said Ginny defiantly.

-

Sorry it’s been so long. I’ve been busy with my H/Hr fic. Please review.
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