Search:

SIYE Time:12:32 on 16th June 2021


Reviewer: juice14 Signed Date: 2009.08.05 - 03:29AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

starstarstarstarstar

Concentrated adventure distilled to its strongest. Nice story! I think it can actually be a framework for something bigger.... 2 thumbs up!

Author's Response: Heh heh! Thanks!



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.07.21 - 12:30PM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

Excellent! Love your last few paragraphs! Are you writing for horror films?

Author's Response: Phew! Four whole reviews! Thanks a lot!

Yes, I intended to close off the last paragraph of Chapter 1 with a cliffhanger. I was indulging my more dramatic muse when I wrote the Creevey scene in Chapter 2, and I took note of certain tropes seen in action movies when I wrote Chapter 3 and 4\'s fight scenes.



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.07.21 - 12:10PM Title: Chapter 3 - Traps

LOL. You have been watching a lot of action films like coppers and robbers! You do know how to write one!



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.07.21 - 11:51AM Title: Chapter 2 - Pauline, Clarke and Stone

Ahhhhhh! Bless his heart. Poor thing needs to find himself. Excellent characterisation, use of emotion. Well done, you.



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.07.21 - 11:39AM Title: Chapter 1 - Letters

That last paragraph was awesome. So mysterious.



Reviewer: hpf2114 Signed Date: 2009.04.14 - 09:51PM Title: Chapter 2 - Pauline, Clarke and Stone

starstarstarstarstar

No Review



Reviewer: hpf2114 Signed Date: 2009.04.14 - 08:38PM Title: Chapter 1 - Letters

starstarstarstarstar

No Review



Reviewer: FirePhoenix86 Signed Date: 2009.03.19 - 03:29AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

Very nice, the Denis Creevey twist was a great idea. I've been having trouble with his character in my story, mainly i can't think of a way to draw out his grief as long as i want too. I liked the whole story, and i might head over to your sequel. Sounded interesting with that little teaser at the end here. very good!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I don\'t know if there will be a sequel or not. I\'m just leaving things open at the end so I have wiggle room if I DO think of a sequel.



Reviewer: FirePhoenix86 Signed Date: 2009.03.19 - 03:29AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

starstarstarstar

Very nice, the Denis Creevey twist was a great idea. I've been having trouble with his character in my story, mainly i can't think of a way to draw out his grief as long as i want too. I liked the whole story, and i might head over to your sequel. Sounded interesting with that little teaser at the end here. very good!



Reviewer: stark40763 Signed Date: 2009.03.15 - 02:10PM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

I do hope you are planning a sequel! This was pretty brilliant! :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I don\'t think there\'ll be a sequel, although I will reuse the universe as a stage for some other fics. I do think Harry isn\'t done with the Knights of Walpurgis ; )



Reviewer: Yunchao Signed Date: 2009.03.13 - 12:29PM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

Great story! I just read this story for judging. I liked the very well thought out and complex plot. I never really believed Clarke haha. Thanks for writing!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! In a way, I guess I have failed. I wanted Clarke to play the helpless old man until finally revealing himself as the real antagonist, although I know that sometimes I couldn\'t get around having him do suspicious things. Ah well, at least the rest of the plot worked :D



Reviewer: piltad Signed Date: 2009.03.13 - 11:43AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

Well that was an interesting ending left you wanting more which is something none of the other stories did they ended it with a firm ending. Have to wonder if you plan on writing more on this plane or not. I will say I really did love it and really do have a tough decision coming up with your story great job can't wait to see more from you.

Till next time,
Tad

Author's Response: Heh! Thanks for the review! Anyway, I did think hard about how to end each chapter and the story in general, and I always want to end my fics with a bit of wriggle room anyway. The last letter is cryptic, but I think you\'ll solve most of the acronyms except \'YKW\' and \'N\'. \'N\' was Stone\'s first name, Nick, in a first draft of the fic, and YKW is You-Know-Who, which is Harry. It\'s an ironic Easter egg thing ; )



Reviewer: piltad Signed Date: 2009.03.13 - 11:31AM Title: Chapter 3 - Traps

Have to say damn Ron just couldn't listen to orders......



Reviewer: piltad Signed Date: 2009.03.13 - 11:21AM Title: Chapter 2 - Pauline, Clarke and Stone

Hmm pointless thought but do wonder if they have 7 elevens in England. I really like what your doing here. My favorite would be Dennis swearing off the magical world after Colin's death I like that idea. Though will say sounds like a certain unforgivable was cast on him,

Till next time,
Tad



Reviewer: piltad Signed Date: 2009.03.13 - 11:12AM Title: Chapter 1 - Letters

I don't know where your going with this so far but I am liking it left your self quite a few options I must say with what you can do. I do wonder if we were supposed to understand the last letter? Cause I sure didn't and now will feel quite stupid if we were.

Till next time,
Tad



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.03.04 - 07:38AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

starstarstarstarstar

Oh, Merlin! What an imagination you have. A downright Harry Potter and the Hammer House of Horrors! Urgh!

Well done and congratulations!

Author's Response: Thanks for your reviews! Hammer House of Horrors? I hardly thought my fic was THAT gruesome...



Reviewer: HGRHfan35 Signed Date: 2009.03.04 - 07:10AM Title: Chapter 3 - Traps

It had been tiled over and rewallpapered to look exactly like an exhibition hall, and six security trolls wearing what looked like goblin armour breasplate with clubs over their shoulders lined the sides of the room going “Grunt grunt gargle grunt” and “grunt snort grunt” (probably Troll for “Mine is longer than yours!” and “Yeah, but mine is thicker!”).

The thought process that went through the most intelligent security troll (whose name was Bogroll) out of the six went like this; Kingsley Shacklebolt (the black guy) had hired them to guard this thin little club, which he really didn’t know what all the fuss was about, since it was so much thinner than his own.

I thought these two parts were quite humoristic. It's all about the size of sticks! :D
Well, I found it funny!
And yes, your story was a lot more lighthearted than other entries who are sometimes to grimm to my taste.



Author's Response: Ahh yes. By the way, Bogroll came from a webcomic. I really should add that disclaimer to the front...



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.03.04 - 07:09AM Title: Chapter 3 - Traps

starstarstarstarstar

Fudge? That nitwit?

Excellent description. Very good use of creative imagination.



Reviewer: HGRHfan35 Signed Date: 2009.03.04 - 04:06AM Title: Chapter 4 - Endgame

starstarstarstarhalf-star

I loved the humour in your story very much. Unlike many stories in this challenge, yours was not to dark and again, brought with a dash of humour.
You left the end open with the suggestion for a 'new' dark lord on the rise. Interesting use of the Knights of Walpurgis, JKR depicted that as the original name of the Death Eaters based on Walpurgis Night.
In short terms, liked it very much and again, I hope you do well in the challange.

Author's Response: Humour? If by \'humour\' you mean the fact that I was rather more light-hearted with the Challenge than some of the other authors, then yes. Otherwise, I\'m quite sure I don\'t know any exceedingly humourous bits in the tale... Mind giving me some feedback as to what parts you found funny? Yes, I left things open... just in case ;) Thanks again for dropping by.



Reviewer: ngayonatkailanman Signed Date: 2009.03.02 - 12:12AM Title: Chapter 2 - Pauline, Clarke and Stone

starstarstarstarstar

How very fascinating.

What intrigue!

Author's Response: Thanks! Last chapter uploaded now, it ties up all the loose ends (well, almost all!).




../back
‘! Go To Top ‘!

Sink Into Your Eyes is hosted by Computer Partners. HARRY POTTER, characters, names and related characters are trademarks of Warner Bros. TM & © 2001-2006. Harry Potter Publishing Rights © J.K.R. Note the opinions on this site are those made by the owners. All stories(fanfiction) are owned by the author and are subject to copyright law under transformative use. Authors on this site take no compensation for their works. This site © 2003-2006 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Special thanks to: Aredhel, Kaz, Michelle, and Jeco for all the hard work on SIYE 1.0 and to Marta for the wonderful artwork.
Featured Artwork © 2003-2006 by Yethro.
Design and code © 2006 by SteveD3(AdminQ)
Additional coding © 2008 by melkior and Bear