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Reviewer: sunnyseaforever Signed Date: 2012.04.26 - 08:50AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Great start. It's really interesting to read something that has been written before DH or the other books for that matter, that has the same scene/idea. Towards the end of this chaper, I was reminded of Harry's thoughts before he died in canon, which was about Ginny.
Reviewer: pottermania Signed Date: 2012.01.26 - 05:43PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Got me gripped:)
Reviewer: GINNY__POTTER258 Signed Date: 2007.01.18 - 07:56PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
wow intresting now to see if harry lives so i'm going to continue on now very original story by the way... : )
Author's Response: Thanks very much. I hope you like the rest.
Reviewer: Chreechree Signed Date: 2007.01.16 - 05:16AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Judged for Challenge
It feels a bit odd writing that considering, but...
I am rereading this so that I can have everything fresh in my mind for fair comparisons, and, Dave, this of course, holds up so well. I'd almost forgotten how good the opening sequence was. Almost. You should let your darker side have free reign more often in your writing.
Author's Response: Should I paste in all the things you said about this before? Not all of them were nice, but . . . err . . . I seem to have misplaced those.
Darker side. Right. That may not be a good idea.
Thanks for everything!
Reviewer: UnorthodoxConvention Signed Date: 2007.01.07 - 08:46AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Really great chapter. I particularly liked this para: "He wanted to tell them what it meant to him to have them there, giving him the chance to finish the war that had started so long ago. He wanted to say that he could not imagine his life without them. He wanted to tell them that, whatever happened, they were the best friends he could ever have asked for, and he wanted them to live long and happy lives together." I think it reflects Harry's relationship with R/ Hr very accurately and poignantly. Well done.
Author's Response: I've certainly not read all the fanfic out there, but I hope that this is a somewhat original version of how love can help defeat Voldemort. Everyone has their part to play. Thanks!
Reviewer: Spenser Hemmingway Signed Date: 2006.12.29 - 10:22AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
This was quite the battle, and a real antention-grabber. Fortunately I see that you have also posted the next chapter. I do have to feel a little bad about the Dursleys...okay, that's enough. You've provided us with not only a well-orchestrated fight scene, but you've set the stage for what I believe is happening next. Not just the end ofVoldemort, but Harry being able to move forward with his life afterward. A good start. Thanks. Eric B.
Author's Response: Bit different for the challenge, isn't it? There's nothing like a cataclysm to set the mood for romance. Thanks!
Reviewer: hjp74 Signed Date: 2006.12.28 - 03:45PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Great first chapter much edger and faster paced then MOM but then there hasnt been a lot of combat in that one yet. Defenatly liked the idea of harry using Reducto rather then the killing curse as even for tom iam not sure harry has it in him to relly mean it. defenatly lokking forward to the next part and how you work a marridge proposale into it
james
Author's Response: I didn't want Harry to use a dark spell at all, and Reducto works just fine. I'm glad you like the pace. Thanks!
Reviewer: cwarbeck Signed Date: 2006.12.28 - 07:12AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Well, Dave, you did tell me this was going to be a bit different for you, but you also told me this ends happily, right? Please don't hurt Harry too much, okay? Good writing though. Much more edgier for you. Is Josh rubbing off of you, perhaps?
Author's Response: Josh did help me "edge-ify" the tone a bit, but the plot is all mine, right down to the
Reviewer: Azabaza Signed Date: 2006.12.28 - 01:41AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
So he casts a shield around them so that the explosion doesn't kill anyone else... hope Harry survives.
Author's Response: Well, in all honesty, it would be very hard to meet the challenge requirements if I killed Harry in the first chapter.
Reviewer: Wergan Signed Date: 2006.12.28 - 01:33AM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Cool story, while I hope to see more, looking forward to Meaning of One more so heres to hoping you didn't abandoned it :) Have a merry holidays.
Author's Response: Oh, goodness, no. MoO is not abandoned at all. In fact, there should be a new chapter posted soon. I just wanted to write for the challenge, and I had a plot line floating around that fit nicely. Happy holidays to you, too!
Reviewer: lecook4 Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 11:43PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
NO-o-o-o-o-o, you can't end it there! Damn! Now I have to wait until you update. This was very good and I look forward to your next chapter. You described Voldemort very well and his reactions to Harry. The fact that it took place inside the Dursley home was interesting too. Update soon.
Author's Response: The next chapter should be online tomorrow. I enjoyed killing off Tom . . . the setting seemed fitting, somehow. Maybe you'll agree when it's done.
Reviewer: calgary Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 11:41PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Oh no....don't end the chapter this way....
Terrific start. You've go the atmosphere moving along with the story. No, don't like the word tragedy in the warnng section. Perhaps when you update next, it will go away. :)
Author's Response: Hmm. I would remind everyone that there is more than one type of tragedy in the world. The warning will stay, but the meaning will become clear. Thanks for reading.
Reviewer: Ginzig1 Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 11:15PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Wow! Not at all what I expected and I mean that in a good way. It will be interesting to see who survives this, I don't want Harry to suffer any more loss than he already has. I'm very intrigued by the title and how you handle this challenge. :)
Author's Response: It's a different approach to the prompt, I think. Hopefully everyone will like how it all fits together. Thanks!
Reviewer: Miri Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 11:03PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Grrr...evil cliffies! Hope the wait for the next/rest is not too long. The story certainly catches you fast enough.
As to trying something new...veddy interesting. I can't quite put my finger on what is changed, but, yes, the narrative flow is somewhat different. It seems...tighter?...sleeker?... As I said, I'm not quite sure what's different, ( it *could* be all in my mind;-) other than the obvious one of not having a POV from Ginny. At least, not yet.
With the title you've chosen and the way your cliffie ends, I can't help wondering if we're going to see a Harry-sorta-returns-from-death scenario, possibly along the lines of the slavic "Katschei" legend. Which means Ginny is probably going to be involved in some way in said return. The "Katschei" story does seem to be one of the possible themes for HP--evil sorcerer, in order to become almost impossible to kill, removes his heart from his body and hides/protects inside 7 different layered objects.
Love Harry's thoughts on Ron and Hermione. Dead Dursleys? Sigh...while many people no doubt think it deserved, I think it would be just one more thing for Harry to grieve over/blame himself for. Voldemort certainly doesn't understnd Harry, does he. I think that gives Harry a real edge in fighting him both here and in cannon.
Will try to wait, semi-patiently, for next installment with a happy ending. Happy and Prosperous New Year to you, yours and the beta team.
Author's Response: I'm glad I'm not the only one who does the double-review thing.
Reviewer: Miri Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 11:03PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Grrr...evil cliffies! Hope the wait for the next/rest is not too long. The story certainly catches you fast enough.
As to trying something new...veddy interesting. I can't quite put my finger on what is changed, but, yes, the narrative flow is somewhat different. It seems...tighter?...sleeker?... As I said, I'm not quite sure what's different, ( it *could* be all in my mind;-) other than the obvious one of not having a POV from Ginny. At least, not yet.
With the title you've chosen and the way your cliffie ends, I can't help wondering if we're going to see a Harry-sorta-returns-from-death scenario, possibly along the lines of the slavic "Katschei" legend. Which means Ginny is probably going to be involved in some way in said return. The "Katschei" story does seem to be one of the possible themes for HP--evil sorcerer, in order to become almost impossible to kill, removes his heart from his body and hides/protects inside 7 different layered objects.
Love Harry's thoughts on Ron and Hermione. Dead Dursleys? Sigh...while many people no doubt think it deserved, I think it would be just one more thing for Harry to grieve over/blame himself for. Voldemort certainly doesn't understnd Harry, does he. I think that gives Harry a real edge in fighting him both here and in cannon.
Will try to wait, semi-patiently, for next installment with a happy ending. Happy and Prosperous New Year to you, yours and the beta team.
Author's Response: Don't worry, the next chapter (of 3 total) will be posted tomorrow.
The difference I spoke of may become more apparent with the remaining two chapters. Then again, it may only exist in my head to begin with. I'll look forward to your opinion when the story's done.
I'm sorry to say that I'm not familiar with the Katschei legend, but it's quite interesting. Ginny does have a role, of course, but I'm not sure Voldemort had a heart to begin with.
Honestly? Killing the Dursleys was not something I did out of spite or a sense of justice. It was just what Voldemort would have done on his way upstairs.
Happy Holidays to you, also!
Reviewer: Jonathan Avery Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 10:43PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
When proof-reading I never did mention how much I liked this ending to Voldemort's life. It is regularly said that he has gone further towards immortality than anyone else, so he would have some other safety guards against his death.
-Jonathan
Author's Response: Yeah, there has to be something else in there. If nothing else, his 'body' is not really a body at all, as we know it, so who knows what happens to it.
Reviewer: sideline Signed Date: 2006.12.27 - 10:34PM Title: Prologue: Burning Day
Wow! That was one heck of a ride. I'm curious about "Tun," I don't think it's Latin. Is it an allusion I'm missing? Harry's hesitation was a nice thread of plot to chase. I thought it was an accurate portrayal to show his regret for his own life after he made the decision; deeply concerned with others and reckless with himself.
Now we get to wait and see who died in the background noise. My money is on Random Auror Number 3 (Poor bloke always snuffs it), most of the bad guys (with one or two escapees allowing for a sense of realism and possible sequels), and one of the known older non-Weasleys exempting Lupin (because someone has to die and it you wouldn't be so cruel... right?). At this point your proposal scene could be airplane napkin quality scribblings and this would still be one of the top challenge stories.
Cheers,
Joel
Author's Response: Hi Joel. I forgot my A/N (which I've added now). 'Tun' is a truncation of a latin word. . . specifically, tundere. I needed something with only one syllable.
That Random Auror must have been wearing a red shirt, eh? You'll get those answers quite soon... the story has 3 chapters, total, and I'll post the next two on the 29th and the 31st.
Thanks for reading!
