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SIYE Time:4:48 on 29th March 2024
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Reviewer: NoTagBacks Signed Date: 2018.09.10 - 06:34PM Title: Biker Girls

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You were able to make a "serious" pun without involving Sirius Black. I'm very impressed. Serious vs. serious is a much overused fanfiction element. Your usage avoided the easy and typical (and boring).

On my third read-through of this chapter I paid more attention to Jacqui's thought that Mike Charlton's fascination with castles was "an almost magical ability." It prompted me to remember that in another one of your other stories, James S. Potter is researching castles. Might he make use of Mike's knowledge in his research? Contact with the future in-laws?



Reviewer: alterdream Signed Date: 2018.07.17 - 08:32PM Title: Biker Girls

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Reviewer: potternut190 Signed Date: 2018.06.30 - 11:06PM Title: Biker Girls

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Another great chapter. I enjoyed the scene at the gibbet calling back to Hunters & Prey. Glad Ginny shared Harry’s stay there and Jaqs mentioning seeing ghosts.

The line about the only straight roads in Britain is something I read at the Bignor Roman Villa. Very true! :-D

Author's Response:
Thanks. The gibbet has, alas, lost the wooden head that used to dangle from it. :-(

Most are, but that particular road doesn't appear to be (and as it's North of Hadrian's wall it's unlikely). I suspect it's a Drover's Road, but without research I can't be sure.

-N-



Reviewer: skiutahnum1 Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 04:04PM Title: Biker Girls

Never get in the way of an idea and Ginny pulling it off...as for jac she needs to grow a pair around mike and show him more responsibilities with the kids....kutgw

Author's Response: Sometimes I think Jacqui's in complete control, but at times she surprises me. -N-



Reviewer: mcepl Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 03:08PM Title: Biker Girls

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It is surprising to me how little I care about this chapter. I understand your tendency to prolong our waiting for the happy end (or whatever end, whatever conclusion you prepared), but there is a difference between heroes struggling against the odds to achieve it and heroes doing nothing. Really, we had chapter 34 where not much happened until to the very end of the chapter (aside from Jacquie and Ginny getting drunk, and Ron getting a girl debraed ;)), chapter 35 which distracted us from the main story, chapter 36 where nothing much happened again (just clean up after the end of the chapter 34), and now we have another chapter where not much happened in terms of the story development. I haven't expected to say it about any of your works, but this starts to be mildly boring.

Author's Response: You're perfectly entitled to your opinion, but I'm beginning to think that the story you want to read is not the story I want to write. That's fine, perhaps someone else will write it for you. -N-



Reviewer: potterfan2008 Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 10:00AM Title: Biker Girls

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Jacqui and Ginny's friendship is so well done. Ginny seems to be relaxing and letting Jacqui in a bit more. I loved the vision of Kingsley in a three piece suit, standing in mud, and pushing a child on a swing. Jacqui would be so mortified if she had any idea who he was! It feels like Harry and Ginny are finally settling into their new life, which is great, except that means the story will end soon - not great!

Author's Response: Thank you. I think that, in the beginning, I was using Henry and James to glue Ginny and Jacqui together. As I've written, they've become closer due to their similarities. In many ways, Jacqui has more in common with Ginny than her two "best friends" Hermione and Luna. Hermione is very career orientated, and Luna travels around the world. Ginny's life has a lot more in common with Jacqui's and both women now recognise that. -N-



Reviewer: lunagranger Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 02:54AM Title: Biker Girls

I shouldn't be lazy and write on the tablet. I know it "corrects" everything into Portuguese. I have written you make me want to go to your part of the world and it has corrected it to "vê vê". And it is particularly, not particulares.

Author's Response: :-)



Reviewer: lunagranger Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 02:54AM Title: Biker Girls

I shouldn't be lazy and write on the tablet. I know it "corrects" everything into Portuguese. I have written you make me want to go to your part of the world and it has corrected it to "vê vê". And it is particularly, not particulares.

Author's Response: :-)



Reviewer: lunagranger Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 02:45AM Title: Biker Girls

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Delightful. Swing King is a lovely man, helping the Potters with the children. And the girls' ride is just something we enjoy with them. You just make me want vê vê your apart of the world, although it wouldn't be easy to go, particulares not on a bike ride.

Author's Response: Thanks. You'll see more of Kingsley in the next chapter. The bike ride was fun to write, part travelogue and part two mothers bonding. I hope it worked. -N-



Reviewer: rbrt_emmer Signed Date: 2018.06.29 - 02:05AM Title: Biker Girls

absolutely lovely chapter my friend. I must admit, I'll be sad when this story actually does reach an ending now. On the one hand, yay, resolution! on the other I've been reading it for nearly 8 years. It'll be weird to know that there is no more wait.

Author's Response: Thank you. I've probably said this before, but I took a leaf out of JKR's book when I started this one. I drafted a final chapter when I started. It is much changed, and still changing, but I've always known that the tale would end on Henry's fifth birthday, after the killers are caught. Getting there has involved a few detours, as Jacqui has grown as a character, and simply refused to do some of the things the plot required of her. -N-



Reviewer: fi103r Signed Date: 2018.06.28 - 04:34PM Title: Biker Girls

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Excellent,

Wondering if Kingsly is a legminse and gathered some data on his own

Lovely bike ride

Keep up the good work!

Author's Response:
Thanks
You'll find out in the next chapter.
Jacqui certainly enjoyed it.
More soon.
-N-



Reviewer: MichiganMuggle Signed Date: 2018.06.28 - 11:23AM Title: Biker Girls

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I think my favorite part of this is Jacqui telling Ginny she is sheltered. If only she knew!

I love how your writing captures the essence of the place. I always feel like I have been to the Cheviot Hills.

Author's Response:
Thanks, I didn't even realise what Jacqui had said until my second read through. These days Jacqui is so real to methey I have very little control over what she says.

I really hope that it does. There's a UK children's writer I've always admired (Jacqui referenced his books in the last chapter), his name is Malcolm Saville, and the descriptions of Shropshire countryside in his books made me want to visit the place.

-N-



Reviewer: Dad Signed Date: 2018.06.28 - 07:20AM Title: Biker Girls

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How much more is there for this story? Visited cragside last year. Interesting chap, William Armstrong. Keep writing. Pure entertainment!

Author's Response: There will be two more chapters, a short interlude, to wrap up the murder plot, and an epilogue. Self made man, Victorian arms manufacturer, hydraulic engineer, his name is everywhere in northeast England. Cragside is a wonder of Victorian engineering, and the grounds are great for walking. I try to take visitors to Cragside, Houesteads, Bamburgh, Alnwick, and Lindisfarne. Unfortunately, the head was removed from the gibbet a few years ago! -N-




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